Love in the Time of COVID-19 (Along with Bravery, Creativity, Kindness...and All Our Other Character Strengths)
/“Love becomes greater and nobler in calamity.”
― Gabriel García Márquez, Love in the Time of Cholera
We often borrow the navy phrase "all hands on deck" during times of challenge and crisis. This phrase reminds us that there are times when everyone, no matter their role or their level in the hierarchy, needs to drop what they are doing to help the larger team achieve an urgent, common goal. We are beginning to learn that the global pandemic of COVID-19 is just such a time. We are all being called to do our part to stop the spread of this potentially deadly virus throughout our communities.
In addition to having "all hands on deck" during this global public health crisis, now more than ever is when we also need to have "all strengths on deck." I am speaking in particular of our character strengths which are the positive ways that we humans think, feel, and behave. Examples of character strengths include qualities such as love, kindness, creativity, leadership, honesty, bravery, and humor, to name a few.
Positive psychology researchers have found there are 24 universal character strengths that are valued across all cultures and faiths. Out of these 24 universal character strengths, you (yes, you!) have 5 to 7 that come most naturally to you and that feel like an essential part of who you are. These are called your signature strengths. When you use your signature strengths, you feel happier, more energized, you have a greater sense of meaning and purpose, and you are better able to bounce back from life's challenges. And who doesn’t need all this right now?
Although we often think of using our strengths as a way to increase our personal well-being, the truth is that sharing these strengths with one another is absolutely critical for our collective well-being too. Humans have always survived by cooperating and sharing our strengths with one another. Working together we are able to accomplish what none of us is equipped to do on our own.
Our strengths should not be treated like luxuries that we only use to live our best lives when times are good. Instead, we need to remember that our strengths are the inner resources and tools we can rely on to help us face life’s toughest challenges. To borrow from the words of the late Nobel Prize winning author, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, love, and all the rest of our positive character strengths, become “greater and nobler” during the most difficult times. If we remember to use them.
If you have not already done so, now is the time to quickly and easily identify your signature strengths by taking 15 minutes or less to take the free, scientifically-validated VIA Character Strengths Survey*, available online in many languages for adults and youth. If you can't take the online assessment right now, you can start by reviewing the list of VIA character strengths and asking yourself "Which 5 of these strengths feel most essential to who I am?" You can also encourage the people around you by naming the character strengths that you see in them or by asking them to guess what their signature strengths might be. You can even get them to take the VIA Character Strengths survey and talk about their strengths results with you. Discovering and encouraging each other’s signature strengths can be a fun and meaningful activity for friends, families, and communities to share together right now when so many other activities are unavailable because of quarantines and social distancing.
Once you have an idea of what your signature strengths are, here are a few questions to get you thinking about how you can use them to help strengthen yourself, your family, and your community during these uncertain times. Remember, this is just a starter list. Research shows that we are all more creative and resourceful in the areas of our signature strengths, so you are bound to have some great ideas about how to help with your strengths that are not listed here. The world needs all our strengths every single day, but most especially during a global pandemic!
How Can Your Strengths* Help You and Your Community During the COVID-19 Pandemic?
If your signature strength is:
Appreciation of Beauty & Excellence – How can you help us to see what is beautiful, excellent or awe-inspiring during this time? How can you shine a spotlight on examples and role models that inspire us to be our very best selves right now? Who is doing something great that we should try to copy?
Bravery – What can you show us about moving forward with what must be done even though we are afraid or anxious? How can you demonstrate speaking up for what is right? What helpful task can you take on that might be too frightening for others?
Creativity – What are some fresh, new ideas that could be helpful right now? What could you create that would be useful?
Curiosity – What questions need to be asked that no one else seems to be asking? What questions can you help find the answers to?
Fairness – How can you help make sure that everyone is being treated fairly? Who is being left out or forgotten and how can you help?
Forgiveness – How can you help us be more patient and understanding with each other? How can you encourage us to give each other second chances to grow and learn from our mistakes?
Gratitude – Who needs to be thanked right now? Who and what are we taking for granted? How can you express gratitude to someone who is putting their own comfort or health at risk to help others?
Honesty – What are the truths that need to be spoken or shared right now? How can you help ensure that things are done with integrity and accountability and that trust is maintained?
Hope – How can you help us believe in a better future? How can you help us see possibilities and opportunities? How can you share your positive vision or encourage one in others?
Humility – What are the small, quiet ways that you can be helpful or make things go more smoothly? What are the humble but necessary jobs that others might overlook? How can you help recognize the overlooked contributions and efforts of others?
Humor – How can you help us find things to laugh about despite our challenges? How can you help us lighten our spirits, brighten our moods, and feel less stressed?
Judgment – How can you help us tell the difference between what is fact, fiction, or opinion? What situations could benefit from your ability to thoughtfully consider all of the evidence before making a decision or suggesting a plan of action?
Kindness – What are some ways you can do good deeds for others to help them make it through this tough time? How can you remind us to be thoughtful, caring, and encouraging to others?
Leadership – How can you help us get organized to work together and achieve our common goals of keeping people healthy and safe? What results can you take responsibility and ownership for making happen in your corner of the world?
Love – How can you make sure people feel valued and cared for right now? Who might feel lonely or could use your warmth and attention?
Love of Learning – What could you learn more about that would be helpful right now? What are the best ideas and practices that need to be shared?
Perseverance – How can you help us keep going when things are tough, and we want to quit? How can you help us stick to the plan and maintain healthy habits so that we can achieve our goals of personal and community well-being?
Perspective – How can you help us make sense of what is happening? How can you help us to be wiser and to keep the bigger picture in mind?
Prudence – How can you help us be to be safer and to pay attention to important rules and guidelines? How can you help us think through the potential consequences of our actions and to plan and prepare more carefully? How can you help prevent us from doing things we might later regret?
Self-Regulation/ Self- Control – Where are some places where your self-discipline could be useful to others? How can you help us monitor ourselves and stay on track with what we have committed to do?
Spirituality/ Sense of Meaning – How can you find and share a sense of purpose or meaning in this crisis that we are experiencing? How can you help others experience more calm, inner strength, and peace?
Social Intelligence – How can you help us better understand each other's different emotions and needs during this time? How can you help people relate to each other's differences in a more positive way?
Teamwork – What can you pitch in and help with right now? Who could use your assistance? What part can you play in helping us succeed?
Zest – How can you help us reconnect with our sense of energy and enthusiasm? How can you help us get excited and stay motivated to do what needs to be done?
